Convention Flubber

By

Wingnut

Of

Pepee's Pornn Palace

Last week I talked about two booths at the convention and how they missed the mark with their marketing attempts. I thought that would be my last article about the show and the marketing methods of the vendors, until I unpacked.

Now I have this huge pile of "stuff" collected from the show, keep in mind that I had already purged stuff while in Vegas. This six-inch pile was supposed to be "the good stuff", of the programs that I wanted to check out for addition to the realm of Wingnut. So, I move aside the free Astroglide and vibrator and uncover my first business card, which I look with a strange tweak in my face. I don't remember this one, must have been a walk by drop into my bag.

Most pieces of spam .. I mean marketing material you get at the show is fairly clear about what exactly it is they are promoting. Not this card, simply a url and a sexy lady in a come fuck me pose. This should have been my first warning not to even type the url into my browser, but, alas, I did. Up pops the page along with several blur consoles, oh goodie, consoles on a webmaster program. Now I see more pictures of sexy ladies in all the best poses, but where is the webmaster link? After exploring the site fully I realize that this is just an average run of the mill paysite, without an affiliate program. Now what the fuck would be going through their heads when they thought about spending the money to promote that site at this convention? One word … Dumbass!

So far not a great start to my "best of" pile! So I shuffle though and grab a flier from a known company (well known to me anyway). I'll have better luck with their new program, right? Strike two. In big bold letters on a nifty new flash banner it states that the program will be going live in March .. March. Now I'm shaking my head, March? I could see late January or early February at the latest. Wasted money, should have saved their wad for the August show.

Now I haven't gone 0 for 2 this bad since trying to get a date for the prom back in my High School days. Ok, time for number three, third times a charm and all that jazz right? Well at least this next site loads and doesn't say the program's not live. So I'm in the middle of the form to sign up and the field for the url of my site isn't long enough to actually fit in more then www.porn, which isn't even close to it. So I clicked submit to see what happens, well it took my sign up and I got the acceptance e-mail for signing up. It said "thanks for joining, use id # 6 for you code", that's it. Now the site has no webmaster area, it's just a promo tour and sign-up form. Just to make this one even better, I got an e-mail from them today saying the site would be launched soon. That word just keeps coming to my lips .. Dumbass.

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